How to Have a Civil Divorce When a Child is Involved
No matter what circumstances surround a divorce, it is important that you remain civil with your ex-spouse when a child is involved. Children need both parents and it is selfish to rob them of this. Make it your goal to follow these steps for your child’s sake.
Stay away from predatory divorce attorneys
There are countless divorce attorneys out there that will try to sway your opinion on the divorce. Their goal is to convince you to go after money and property so that they can take a large cut. They will not be looking out for your best interests, so do your best to avoid them. Simply focus on finding an attorney that has a track record of civil agreements during divorce and child custody.
Remember that your child needs both parents
It’s much easier to remain civil when you focus on your child’s needs as opposed to your feelings. Children will benefit from having both parents in their life. So if you truly want the best for your child then you should focus on remaining civil with your ex-spouse.
Try to understand your ex-spouses’ point of view
This can be difficult for many, but you should really follow this step. There are always two sides to a story and most people are not intentionally cruel to people they love. Your ex-spouse likely feels the same that you do about the situation, so keep this in mind when you are going through a divorce.
Don’t talk badly about your ex
If you talk poorly about your ex-spouse, it sends many signals to your child that are confusing. First it makes them ashamed to love their parent. It also diminishes their respect for the parent which can cause many problems down the road. Follow the golden rule in this situation…would you want your ex-spouse talking poorly about you in front of the children?
Respect each others home rules
You and your ex-spouse likely have different home-rules that you expect the child to obey. It is important for a child to learn that they are expected to follow different rules in different settings. As long as your child isn’t doing anything that you consider seriously inappropriate, you should respect the ex-spouses rules.
Always make it a priority to remain friendly with your ex-spouse. If you can do this, then it will make things much easier. All-in-all it comes down this rule. The child will benefit from this as well, so make an effort to remain friendly.